Fall is here

Well, it's Fall ag'in and the akerns is fallin'. Me and my kin have got a'plenty to eat. But deer season is open, so us hawgs has got to be real careful. I've told all my kin not to go t' that deer corn in th' daytime. Wait 'til night. We stay in a thicket 'til dark.

I seen Rhoda down at th' waller yesterday. She's been gone fer over a year. She run off with that Arkansaw Razorback that called hisself Al. You know, she always runs off with th' first Tom, Dick, er Harry that comes along. Sometimes she c'n be a pain in the bristles.

When Big Al showed up here in th' bottoms she takened t' him right away. Rhoda thought Al was th' handsomest hawg she ever seen. It was "Al done this," an' "Al done that." Phhssst! I thought t' myself. His nose is longer'n his tail. I think he's the ugliest hawg I ever seen.

After she come back t' these parts, I asked Rhoda about ol' Al. She said she left him in a pen up there som'ers on th' far side 'a Hot Springs, with a passel 'a his kin.

I've h'yeard about them Arkansaw Razorbacks her years. They're differ'nt from us wild hawgs here in Louisiana. They say two 'a their legs on one side is shorter'n th' other two. That's 'cause they walk around them high hills goin' th' same direction fer too long. I've h'yeard a lot 'a other stuff about 'em that I don't put much confidence in. But Rhoda told me it's true about th' short legs, but is mostly th' older hawgs. I guess it jis' takes 'em time t' git lopsided.

Rhoda said when the akerns start t' fall up there it was hard fer her and her shoats t' git anything t' eat. A razorback can hear a akern fall a quarter mile away and catch it on th' second bounce. Rhoda says they are th' fastest hawgs in th' world. She says they's a football team up there som'ers they call th' Razorbacks. I reck'n it must be b'cause they run fast, too. But I don't think they eat no akerns.